Listen this may sound like an easy thing to do…but I can be completely transparent when I say that I have struggled with this for as long as I can remember. Call it imposter syndrome or just never feeling celebrated but I can admit I struggled to be proud of myself.
There is something that felt so guilty about celebrating myself. I have always enjoyed celebrating others but me…no I’m good. I am sure I wasn’t always like this but years of not being celebrated likely had an impact.
I can remember winning awards as a kid and it was no big deal because it was an expectation to perform academically or it was understood that I would do well. Geesh…the pressure!
I get it but I eventually had to tell my parent that just because they feel like I could or would do something doesn’t mean that it was easy for me. I honestly feel like this is where my anxiety was birthed. The expectation that I would get it right or achieve without support or a cheering section became overwhelming. I never felt prepared enough and my nerves would be so bad going into every situation that would require a test.
Yes I would pass with what felt like minimal effort on my part but the mental anguish I would take myself through in order to achieve was exhausting me. I started to feel like it was so much easier to set the bar low and underachieve rather than exceed anyone’s expectations (textbook gifted characteristic)!
But is that healthy though? I don’t know if it is the wisdom that comes with age or something cosmic and spiritual, but all I desire at this point is to be happy, healthy, and free.
I know now that this looks like me being proud of me and celebrating myself. It looks like not being afraid to share my accomplishments. (I need to be my own biggest fan right?!) It also looks like creating goals that are meaningful to me so that when I achieve them I am only concerned with my feelings of accomplishment.
The message is: 🗣🗣🗣 👏🏽Celebrate 👏🏽your 👏🏽self 👏🏽girl! -MichelleRena
Be proud of yourself…ALWAYS!!! I can do hard things and you can too. Crushing goals looks different for everyone and that’s how it should be. Set your bar where you want it to be and adjust it accordingly as you see fit. It took me a long time to realize that I make the rules for my life. You do too…now run with it! Whatever you decide to do make protecting your peace a priority!